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Pick of the bunch

Pied Pipers & Bitten Buttocks!
Di La Fing

Pied Piper?

A tourist browsing a curio shop in San Francisco saw a very lifelike bronze statue of a rat. It had no price tag, but was so striking he decided he must have it.

He asked the shop owner: “How much for the bronze rat?”

The reply: “$20 for the rat, $200 for the story.”

The tourist gave the man $20 and said, “I’ll take the rat, but you can keep the story.”

As he walked down the street carrying his bronze rat, he noticed a few real rats crawling out of the alleys and sewers and following him. This was disconcerting, so he began walking faster. But, within a couple blocks, the herd of rats behind him had grown to hundreds, and they started squealing.

He began to trot toward the Bay. But, glancing back, he saw that the rats now numbered in the thousands, and were squealing and snarling and coming towards him faster and faster!

Terrified, he sprinted to the edge of the Bay and hurled the bronze rat far out into the water. Amazingly, the millions of rats rushed past him and jumped into the Bay after it, and all were drowned!

The man returned to the curio shop. “Aha,” said the shop owner, “You have come back for the story!”

“No,” said the man, “I came back to see if you have a bronze politician?”


Only in America

A man from Little Rock, Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbour’s beagle.  The beagle was on a chain in its owner’s fenced-in yard – as was the man.  The award was less than the amount sought because the jury felt that the man, who at the time, was shooting the animal repeatedly with a pellet gun, might have provoked the dog.

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