TASTE TEST!
At the end of the year, a kindergarten teacher was receiving Xmas gifts from her pupils. The florist’s son handed her a gift.
She shook it, held it overhead, and said, “I bet I know what it is. Some flowers.”
“That’s right!” the boy said, “but how did you know?”
“Oh, just a wild guess,” she said.
The next pupil was the sweet shop owner’s daughter. The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, “I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets.”
“That’s right, but how did you know?” asked the girl.
“Oh, just a wild guess,” said the teacher.
The next gift was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking.
She touched a drop of the leakage with her finger and touched it to her tongue.
“Is it wine?” she asked.
“No,” the boy replied with some excitement.
The teacher repeated the process, taking a larger drop of the leakage to her tongue.
“Is it champagne?” she asked.
“No,” the boy replied with more excitement.
The teacher took one more taste before declaring, “I give up; what is it?”
With great glee, the boy said, “It’s a puppy!”
SKYDIVING FOR DUMMIES:
A new skydiver and his instructor were high in the air as the student was
getting ready to jump. Just before he leapt from the plane, his teacher gave him some final instructions:
“Listen carefully! You jump … count to three … and pull your rip cord! If that doesn’t work, pull the cord on your reserve chute! There will be a truck down there to pick you up.”
The new skydiver took a deep breath and plunged into the open air. After free-falling, he counted to three and pulled his ripcord. Nothing happened. He pulled the cord on his reserve chute, and nothing happened. Totally disgusted, the skydiver muttered to himself, “DANG! I’ll bet that truck’s not down there either!”
