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Backchat Red-faced at rugby

Backchat

Red-faced at Rugby
by John Cooney

I DON’T EMBARRASS EASILY. But I got embarrassed – extremely embarrassed! – at schoolboy rugby several years ago. And my grandkids have never let me forget … 

As was the custom, I had been summoned to watch their game. I duly arrived at the appointed sports ground, and duly parked my car. Then I duly pounded up and down the sidelines in my gumboots, stumbling over other parents, and shouting encouragement at our team – who duly won, in the end!

But, on the way back to the car, with grandkids demanding piggy-backs, and begging, “Can we come home with you, pleeeeeease!” – I discovered that, oh no, I’d lost my car-keys! 

I blamed a granddaughter who had, earlier, been digging around in my pocket for lollies. But she swore she didn’t have them.

“You must’ve dropped them back there!” I grumped, about to go searching through that sideline mud.

“But the car’s not even LOCKED …” she announced, pulling open the door.

“And the keys are still HERE …” she declared.

“AND THE MOTOR’S STILL GOING!” shouted six grandchildren in unison. 

Looking back, I probably shouldn’t have gone to rugby that day. I probably should’ve stayed home and mowed the lawns. And I’m still struggling to understand how I not only PARKED the car – but left it UNLOCKED – with the KEYS STILL IN IT – and the ENGINE STILL RUNNING – while I pounded, stumbled and shouted my way through an hour of rugby!

My grandkids thought it was hilarious! But my wife was worried about my mental health, despite my attempts to blame the children who, I argued, must’ve distracted me. 

But it wasn’t a Senior Moment, was it? It CAN’T have been! I mean, like I keep saying, I’m not THAT old. 

Am I … ?  


JOHN – GRAPEVINE’S FOUNDER & ‘BIG CHEESE’ – SHARES THIS EMBARRASSING EPISODE IN CONFIDENCE, AND WOULD ASK PLEASE THAT YOU DON’T TELL EVERYBODY. “I’VE STILL GOT MY PRIDE, AFTER ALL …” 

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