I’VE ALWAYS BEEN FASCINATED by the New Zealand Special Air Service (NZSAS), the premier combat unit of the NZ Defence Force. It’s regarded as an elite fighting force, ranked alongside the British SAS, and the USA’s Delta Force and Navy SEALS. In fact, one US special forces soldier operating alongside the NZSAS in Afghanistan was quoted as saying, “We weren’t going soft, but we paled next to the Kiwis!”
Highly secretive in their missions, they’re deployed all over the world and are responsible for mostly counter-terrorism stuff (though who really knows?). I have a good friend who was in the SAS for seven years, and he’d get a phone call in the night, and would be gone by morning, unable to tell his wife where he was going or for how long. Tough on marriages for sure!
The selection process is ridiculously hard, and runs once a year over 10 days – a body-breaking, mentally demanding ordeal designed to strip the candidates bare. The physical nature of selection is one thing, but add to the mix the restricted food intake, lack of sleep and mental gymnastics your mind is forced to play, it’s any wonder only a small number make it through. From 2013 to 2017, 243 candidates took part, with just 31 completing the course.
While strength and endurance are essential, it’s mental toughness that is the key to finishing.
Mental toughness. It’s a quality that doesn’t receive enough attention, considering how important it is. It’s not something ‘taught’ at schools, nor is it a trait that we’re actively encouraged to cultivate. Yet it’s vital if we’re ever going to maximise our potential. Mental toughness helps us in our relationships, in our jobs, in our sports and recreation … and I’d argue it’s crucial for maintaining our mental health. It’s that inner strength that prevents us from giving up when things get tough.
We talk a lot about physical toughness – how far you can run, how much you can bench-press, how many push-ups you can do, but if you don’t have a tough mind, you don’t have anything. Because, for most people, your mind will always quit before your body does.
A number of years ago, I was involved in a national youth organisation that worked in schools teaching life skills. Each year, we ran a two-term training programme for our new recruits. The initial phase of this training was seven days of unique mental and physical testing, called our Challenge Exposure. My SAS friend joined me each year to run this part of the programme – and it’s fair to say that he had a big part to play in its development!
It always amazed me how far he could take our young recruits. Time and time again, we had people wanting to give up – adamant that their bodies couldn’t go any further. But they always could! He was a master at pushing them to their limits and pulling them back just at the right moment. The feedback was almost universal: they achieved more and went further than they ever thought possible. Their mental toughness (under strict supervision) enabled them to reach goals they’d previously thought were out of reach.
So, how do we cultivate that mental ‘toughness’?
Put yourself in tough situations. Tough situations that you can overcome, but not easily.
Now, there are a number of ways you can do this: sign up for a marathon, walk the Te Araroa Trail, enter the Coast to Coast … but I’d argue that whatever situation you put yourself in, the background environment that gives you the best results is in the ‘great outdoors’.
Why is that? Well, it’s the very fact that we can’t CONTROL it, in a world where we control nearly everything! You will encounter tough situations everywhere in the outdoors – some you can plan for, such as a multi-day hike in the backcountry; and others that appear unexpectedly, like being caught out in a blizzard.
I’ve been lucky enough to have had a life filled with experiences in the outdoors – many of them unplanned – with enough crazy adventures that I really should write a book! These have undeniably helped develop a mental toughness that would’ve been nearly impossible to gain any other way. In some of those situations, I had no choice but to keep going. If I’d quit when my mind wanted me to, I’d now be a pile of bones deep in the bush … which wasn’t an option I was overly keen on!
Now, I’m no SAS soldier – I’m just a regular guy. But I know without a doubt that I’m pretty tough, mentally … and that’s primarily due to the situations (aka, adventures!) I’ve put myself in.
Probably one of the best resilience builders I can think of is hunting – especially the type that takes you deep into our back country for several days (not shooting rabbits on a neighbour’s paddock!). It contains many of the ingredients needed to develop that mental toughness: patience, perseverance, disappointment, hard work, risk, deprivation, pain, fatigue, reward, etc.
Like, for example, the hours spent quietly stalking through the bush searching for your quarry … only to hear a ‘bark’ somewhere ahead, and the glimpse of a deer’s rump vanishing into the foliage. Eluded again! Then, as your skill level improves along with the opportunities, there’s the disappointment of a miss … and even worse, the tragedy of a wounded animal from a rushed shot.
When I finally started having success, those tough situations kept coming! Carrying a deer carcass out of the bush on your back was, in my books, the measure of a man – it was hard work! Squeezing through thick undergrowth with bush lawyer and supplejack tearing your legs and tripping your feet. Rifle and carcass (especially if it was a stag with big antlers) getting caught on branches and vines. Feeling the deer’s legs dig evermore painfully into your shoulders as you stagger under the weight … the hut still hours away.
The mind starts playing funny games when you’re under stress … “You can’t carry this any further – ditch the deer, and get back to the warm, dry hut!”
Then there are those unexpected situations: the times I’ve been ‘temporarily misplaced’ (aka, lost) in the bush. The injuries. The navigation after dark with a failing torch and compass because I’d completely underestimated how long the walk was. Getting ‘bluffed’ climbing down Mt Cook’s Liebig Range and having to find another way off the mountain as nightfall approached. Putting a hole in my jetboat just on dusk, way up the Whanganui River … the list goes on!
But it’s not just about hunting. Some of the multi-day walks I’ve done have been amazing for building mental toughness! Hiking through areas like Fiordland, Mt Cook, the West Coast, Kaimanawas, etc, have all tested and strengthened my resilience. And then there were the storms, the wind, the rain, the snow, the ice, the avalanches … all things beyond my control, yet things I had to adapt to and push through if I wanted to succeed.
In all the challenges I encountered during these adventures, my mind wanted to quit before my body. But I kept going. I simply decided that giving up wasn’t an option.
So, put yourself in tough situations! Build that mental toughness – that resilience – and watch how it positively impacts all areas of your life. You’ll discover you won’t give up so easily on your relationships, your marriage, your children, your career … or your dreams. You can achieve far more than you think.
And heck, maybe you’ll be inspired to sign up for the next SAS selection!
CAUTION: PLEASE DON’T SIMPLY DISAPPEAR INTO THE WILDERNESS TO GET MENTALLY TOUGH. DO SOME PLANNING FIRST! REMEMBER THE 6 P’S: PRIOR PLANNING PREVENTS P*SS POOR PERFORMANCE.
