HOW DINOSAURS WENT EXTINCT
Three dinosaurs stumble across a magic lamp. They rub it, and a genie appears.
“I have three wishes, so I’ll give one to each of you,” the genie announces.
The first dinosaur thinks hard.
“Alright,” he says, “I’ll have a big, juicy piece of meat.”
Instantly, the biggest, juiciest piece of meat he’d ever seen appears in front of him.
Not to be outdone, the second dinosaur thinks even harder.
“I know! I’ll have a shower of meat!”
Immediately, huge pieces of meat rain down around him.
The third dinosaur, certainly not to be outdone, thinks harder than the previous dinosaurs.
“I’ve got it!” he cries, ”I want a MEATIER shower!”
PAINFUL PARROT:
A magician was working on a Caribbean cruise ship. The audience was different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again.
There was only one problem: The captain’s parrot saw the show every week and began to understand what the magician did in every trick. Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show:
“Look, it’s not the same hat.”
“Look, he’s hiding the flowers under the table.”
“Hey, why are all the cards the Ace of Spades?”
The magician was furious but couldn’t do anything; it was the captain’s parrot, after all.
One day the ship had an accident and sank. The magician found himself on a piece of wood, in the middle of the ocean, and, of course, the parrot was by his side. They stared at each other with hate, but did not utter a word.
This went on for several days. After a week, the parrot finally said: “Okay, I give up. What’d you do with the boat?”
